The Scottish secession . . .

Queen Elizabeth wants to stay out of it.

Actor Sean Connery wants it to happen.

And the British royal family is fretting about whether they’ll lose the use of Balmoral Castle as their Scottish hideaway from duty during parts of the year.

So here’s a few wee words about the gloman or gloom being felt by the citizens of Scotland who face a vote next week on whether to break away from the British union. 

Those that want to stay are primarily concerned about their country’s economy, which is rich in whiskey and oil — and a colorful history.

But it’s not hard to see why the proud Scots feel like they’ve become second-class citizens since becoming part of Great Britain.

Check out this hilarious − slightly redacted − quote from a recently published memoir, “Love, Nina: A Nanny Writes Home,” by British author Nina Stibbe, who was once a nanny to the children of renowned British film director Stephen Frears and his ex-wife, the London Review of Books editor Mary-Kay Wilmers.

In the book, Stibbe recalls a map of Great Britain drawn by one of her Junior School teachers.

“She taught us how to draw a detailed map of Great Britain by drawing a woman in a bonnet riding a pig. I’ll never forget the awful picture she drew on the board as an example. 

“The woman’s face represented North Wales . . . and the pig she was riding [was] South Wales. Both with mouths open as if shouting.”