Cheryl Lavin: Couple in their seventies start hesitantly, then relationship takes off

There’s a lot to be said for youth, of course. Firm skin, taut body, stamina, endurance, flexibility. Young joints don’t creak, young bones don’t ache when it rains. Ah, but does all that really compare to the wisdom that comes with age?

Mike was married for 55 “wonderful” years. Two years ago, after his wife died, he was “very reluctantly” set-up on a blind date. It was his first in his entire life. A mutual friend wanted him to meet Carol who had been a widow for four years. He was 75 at the time, she was 73.

“We hit it off immediately,” says Mike. “We had so much in common that after just a few more dates, we both felt a long-term relationship was a definite possibility. But before proceeding further, we decided to check out our sexual compatibility. We agreed to go away for a weekend and make love. This would be the first time either of us had been intimate with anyone other than our spouses. So understandably, we were both quite apprehensive! To enhance the chances of success, I gave the situation much thought, resulting in this memo that I wrote to Carol before the planned weekend.”

Here’s a copy of the memo that Mike sent to Carol:

“Carol, Luv, I’m still apprehensive, too, but really looking forward to the excitement ahead! (Sort of like waiting for a first parachute jump!) Here are some thoughts to enhance our first love-making experience:

“To begin, we change into something comfortable to avoid awkward fumbling with buttons, belts, buckles and bras. Buy yourself a lovely negligee with the enclosed cash. Low lights set a more romantic mood — they also hide my wrinkles! — so I’ll bring a candle or two. And a match. Then we need some soft back-ground music — Mantovani, maybe? There’s no CD player in the room, so I’ll bring mine and some romantic CDs. We’ll have a glass of chilled wine for relaxation. A little dab of perfume in all the right places would be lovely. We could try a little basic dancing. Wouldn’t that be romantic? (Unless I step on your bare toes!)

“Let’s pretend we’re already long-time lovers, just here for a weekend getaway, aiming to devote our full attention to each other. Let’s take it slow, putting the emphasis on the journey, not the destination. We’ll have lots of kissing, touching, loving caresses, exploring. We’ll talk to each other. You’ll tell me what you’d like, how you’re feeling, you’ll set the pace. Let’s keep it light, make it fun!

“All of the above are subject to instant abandonment in the heat of the moment, if the excitement gets out of hand! (Wouldn’t that be great?) The earth may not tremble and shake, Carol, but my goal is to give you as much pleasure as possible! What do you think? Any suggestions?”

Mike says he’s “very happy to report that this plan for our first love-making was a resounding success.” So successful in fact that they were married in a romantic beach wedding six months later.

“You will be surprised (incredulous?) to learn that our love-making is still torrid and very frequent 18 months later. Essentially every night! (And occasionally the following morning, too!) Still with candlelight and romantic music.”

Does sex get better with age? Send your tale, along with your questions, problems and rants to cheryllavinrapp@gmail.com.

And check out my new ebook, “Dear Cheryl: Advice from Tales from the Front.” COPYRIGHT 2014 CREATORS.COM