Dear Abby: Mom upset at treatment of her thieving daughter

SHARE Dear Abby: Mom upset at treatment of her thieving daughter

DEAR ABBY: Yesterday, when I picked my granddaughter “Michelle” up from school, she asked me to take her to get a pizza. I told her I had no money, and she responded that she had her own money. She then pulled $40 out of her pocket. Michelle is only 9 and has no job.

When I asked where she got the money, she told me, “A little boy who’s disabled gave it to me.” I didn’t believe her story, and after I questioned her further, she confessed that she had taken the money from a boy who is NOT disabled.

I took the money from her and gave it to her teacher. Her teacher said the boy had accused Michelle, but Michelle had sworn she hadn’t taken it. Abby, my granddaughter not only took his money, but also lied about it. I was devastated.

When I told my daughter, she said I should have let her and her husband handle it because now Michelle’s teacher won’t like her and may treat her differently. My daughter is now upset with me, but I was just trying to do the right thing. Did I do the wrong thing? — HURT GRANDMA IN TEXAS

DEAR HURT GRANDMA: I don’t think so. I’m not sure how your daughter planned to “handle it” and make things right for the boy who was bullied and stolen from, but by doing what you did, you ensured that he got his money back.

One can only hope that Michelle got a talking-to from her parents about what she did, and has learned not to repeat it. But if she’s tempted to do it again, it’s just as well that her teacher will keep a closer eye on her.

DEAR ABBY: My husband has been in prison for three and a half years, but now he’s moving to a halfway house where he will have much more freedom. He wants to attend my church with me, and I know people there will have questions. Only a few of them know where he has been because I shared it with them.

What’s the best way to make this comfortable for both of us and share it as we need to? — FREE AT LAST

DEAR FREE AT LAST: That your husband would like to attend church with you is laudable, and I hope his entry into the congregation will be a smooth one. I have often said that once a “secret” is known by more than one person, it is no longer a secret. Discuss this with your clergyperson and let him or her guide you in the process. If you do, it may help to avoid any rough spots along the way.

DEAR ABBY: Many people these days rely on their devices to auto-correct spelling and grammatical errors. Too often I see signage on businesses with misspellings. A few of my friends own their own businesses, and their postings on social media are often misspelled. Sometimes they ask for my opinion. Should I offer advice or ignore this growing trend? — MISS PELLED IN THE SOUTH

DEAR MISS PELLED: Offer advice only when it’s been requested. Advice that is unasked for is usually unwelcome. Unless you want to be known as the “grammar hammer,” keep it to yourself.

Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at http://www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.

To receive a collection of Abby’s most memorable — and most frequently requested — poems and essays, send your name and mailing address, plus check or money order for $7 (U.S. funds), to: Dear Abby — Keepers Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447. Shipping and handling are included in the price.

The Latest
The man was shot in the left eye area in the 5700 block of South Christiana Avenue on the city’s Southwest Side.
Most women who seek abortions are women of color, especially Black women. Restricting access to mifepristone, as a case now before the Supreme Court seeks to do, would worsen racial health disparities.
The Bears have spent months studying the draft. They’ll spend the next one plotting what could happen.
Woman is getting anxious about how often she has to host her husband’s hunting buddy and his wife, who don’t contribute at all to mealtimes.
He launched a campaign against a proposed neo-Nazis march at a time the suburb was home to many Holocaust survivors. His rabbi at Skokie Central Congregation urged Jews to ignore the Nazis. “I jumped up and said, ‘No, Rabbi. We will not stay home and close the windows.’ ”