DEAR ABBY: My 14-year-old daughter caught her father, my husband, emailing and texting other women. He has been doing it for months.
He says he went on dating sites because he was unhappy in our marriage and needed attention and to feel desirable. He claims he only emailed and texted these women discussing relationship troubles, no sex talk.
I’m furious he was so careless that our daughter found the emails (in one he stated his sex drive was very high and asked how her sex drive was).
I am devastated that he would do this to our family. He says he didn’t think it was cheating because it was only online and sex wasn’t discussed. Please advise. — FURIOUS IN THE SOUTH
DEAR FURIOUS: Your husband isn’t being honest. At the very least there was “sex talk” as soon as he used that three-letter word in his emails/texts to the women on the dating sites.
You two are overdue for a visit to a marriage and family therapist to determine if the damage your husband has done to his relationship with you and his daughter can be repaired. Please do not wait to schedule an appointment.
DEAR ABBY: My ex-wife and I were together for five years (married for two). While she was with me I supported her financially and put her through college. She left me a year ago.
I was the one who filed for divorce. After she left, I gave her half the money in my savings account to help her while she was trying to land on her feet. She has found a job now, but struggles to pay bills.
Recently, she called and asked me to “lend” her money to help with her power bill. I refused.
While I understand that she’s no longer my financial responsibility, I still feel compelled to help her. What can I do to prevent her from putting me in an awkward situation (I have since moved on to a new relationship) without having to be a complete jerk? — NICE GUY IN TEXAS
DEAR NICE GUY: As you accurately put it, your ex-wife is no longer your responsibility.
After she walked out on you, you did the right thing in filing for divorce. You are acting like you feel guilty for doing so. By paying for her education and enabling her to support herself, you were more than generous.
The surest way to prevent yourself from being hit on for money would be to respond with a firm and final NO.
DEAR ABBY: I’m a 9-year-old girl and my mom doesn’t spend a lot of quality time with me. What should I tell her to get her to spend time with me? — NEEDS TIME IN FLORIDA
DEAR NEEDS TIME: What a sad letter. Not knowing why your mother isn’t giving you enough quality time, I can only suggest that you tell her you need more of her and hope she hears how important your message is.
DEAR READERS: Once again, this is my annual reminder to those of you who live where daylight saving time is observed: Don’t forget to turn your clocks forward one hour tonight at bedtime. Daylight saving time begins at 2 a.m. tomorrow.
It’s a ritual I love because it signals the coming of spring, with longer, brighter days and warmer weather.
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at http://www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
Abby shares more than 100 of her favorite recipes in two booklets: “Abby’s Favorite Recipes” and “More Favorite Recipes by Dear Abby.” Send your name and mailing address, plus check or money order for $14 (U.S. funds), to: Dear Abby, Cookbooklet Set, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447. (Shipping and handling are included in the price.)