Bears could really use 42-year-old Tom Brady, but why would he want them?

Here are all the reasons the Bears wouldn’t want Tom Brady:

— He’s 42.

— He’s coming off his worst season in years.

— He’d need time to learn coach Matt Nagy’s involved offense, and if there’s one thing that Nagy and general manager Ryan Pace don’t have a lot of, it’s time.

— He made $23 million in 2019 and could command more on the open market.

— His arrival would hurt Mitch Trubisky’s feelings.

Here are all the reasons the Bears should want Brady:

— He’s Tom Freakin’ Brady.

— He still threw for 4,057 yards this season for a 12-4 team that didn’t have many offensive weapons. The last time the Bears had a 4,000-yard passer was, oh, right, never.

— Even at 42, he’s so much better than Trubisky at running an offense and reading defenses that just thinking about it makes you want to cry.

— His signing would be perfect cover for Nagy and Pace, who could say, “As much as we love Mitch, how do you say no to perhaps the greatest quarterback in NFL history?”

In March, Brady will become a free agent for the first time in his 20-year career. He and the Patriots lost a wild-card game against the Titans on Saturday, opening the door to more speculation about his future. Will New England re-sign him? Will he call it a career knowing his skills have deteriorated? Or will he stick it to the talent-challenged Patriots and sign with a franchise that will offer him another chance to win a Super Bowl?

The people at Halas Hall who decided Trubisky was going to be a star shouldn’t be choosing any quarterback for any team. But if the Bears’ decision-makers dismiss the idea of Brady out of hand, they should be handed a blindfold and asked for any final words. If Brady is available come March, it would be criminal if Pace and Nagy didn’t take a hard look at a man who was the NFL’s most valuable player just two seasons ago. You know, when he was 40.

You’ve probably heard the phrase “sustained success’’ enough times to require an emergency visit to the bathroom whenever it’s uttered. It’s what sports executives say these days when they want fans to know they’re in it for excellence over a long stretch, not for just one isolated title. You can almost hear Pace’s rationale for not wanting Brady: We’re not after quick — and brief — success. See if you can imagine my eyes rolling as I write a response to that way of thinking: You are so right. Bears fans wouldn’t want one measly Super Bowl title, a title that would be the first for the team since the 1985 season. They want sustained success!

Brady can’t move like he used to, but he used to move like a tortoise, so who cares? Trubisky can run, but he hardly ran in 2019, so if you’re going to have a stay-at-home quarterback, why not make it someone whose home is a castle filled with six Super Bowl rings?

The idea of Brady and the Bears getting together isn’t as outlandish as it seems. Denver won a Super Bowl in 2015 with 39-year-old Peyton Manning. Brady will be better at 43 in 2020 than Manning was at 39 in 2015. Genes and whatever magical diet Brady follows have allowed him to play at a high level for a long time. He has said as recently as October that he wants to play until he’s 45. People have been trying to retire him for years, and it’s happening in earnest now. I wouldn’t be so quick to count him out, especially if I were the quarterback-famished Bears.

The Broncos had a great defense in 2015, holding opponents to a league-best 4.4 yards per play. Their offense was mediocre, ranking 19th in points and 16th in total yards. All they needed was a quarterback who could make enough right decisions. That was Manning when he was healthy and Brock Osweiler when he wasn’t.

The Bears, when they’re healthy, have a dominant defense, similar to the one the Broncos had five years ago. They don’t have a Super Bowl-ready quarterback. They also don’t have a Super Bowl offensive line, a Super Bowl group of receivers, a Super Bowl tight end or a Super Bowl play-caller.

They’re more than a good quarterback away from winning a title, but Brady might cut the distance down considerably. He has a history of making lesser players better. He was born a leader, not handed a book and told to learn to be one.

The question, then, shouldn’t be why the Bears would want Brady.

It should be why on earth Brady would want the Bears.

He needs a new challenge? Chicago’s a nice play to live? Spite? I don’t know. Here’s hoping the Bears want him. Here’s hoping they don’t give him a lowball offer. Here’s hoping that, if they do give him a lowball offer, it won’t irritate him and his fabulously rich supermodel wife.

That’s a lot of hoping. What else is left for Chicago to do?