'Dancing with the Stars' semi-finals hot to trot

Okay, so the semi-finals tonight really proved why these four celebs are still in the running for the mirrorball trophy:

Mya, because she’s a professional dancer (dancing since she was a tot);

Joanna, because she has proven that even someone who gave up on a dream of dance as a little girl, could rekindle that dream so many years later in such an amazing way;

Kelly, because the “wild child” — as she has been affectionately dubbed in this season’s lineup — proved that everyone deserves the benefit of the doubt (she has truly blossomed into an elegant dancing lady, who can still swear like a sailor but that’s neither here nor there);

Donny, because, well, he had more fans than Aaron Carter. Osmond is a true entertainer, but he is not of the dancing caliber of the three ladies who faced off against him tonight.

And what an amazing night it was. Kym Johnson (who borrowed Edyta Slywinska’s VERY revealing wardrobe for the night) and Donny Osmond just completely fell apart during their first dance (each couple had three tonight) turning a tango into a tang-not. Not even the super-sexy king of “Dancing” Gilles Marini could make Donny see what it takes to deliver the most passionate of all dances. And what was with Donny’s swipe at his sister Marie (seated next to Mary Hart, who might just be eyeing a spot in next seaons’s DWTS?). Remarking everything was great until he “saw Marie” wasn’t funny. He was a little better in round two with a samba that Carrie Ann described as “sloppy.” Not an adjective you want to hear in the semi-finals. But it still earned him a 26.

Kelly came out with guns blazing, doing a decent rhumba on her first try and then knocking it out of the park in round two. Her scores of 24 and 27 were nice, but at this stage of the game, she really needed a pair of 27s, or more.

Joanna also came to do battle with a positively gorgeous Viennese waltz that truly deserved 10s from the judges, but alas, she had to settle for a trio of 9s. In round two, her cha cha cha was again, positively sizzling, and yet, the judges couldn’t bring themselves to raise the “10” paddles, sending her to the dressing rooms with another round of 9s.

Mya, the pro dancer/singer, of course took home the night’s highest scores, first with a 28 for her waltz followed by a perfect score of 30 for her salsa — a dance that led judge Len Goodman to remark “I was mesmerized by your buttocks.” Nice Len, real nice.

Then it was off to the homestretch is the “knockout dance” round, wherein each couple got to do their 60-second “dance-off” routine. Donny’s jitterbug pleased the judges, , earning him a generous 27. Joanna did a perfect salsa, but again, the judges couldn’t find their 10 paddles, instead showering her with a round of 9s (the same score they gave Donny’s jitterbug). Kelly really came out swinging, or more to the point, cha cha cha-ing and earned a 27 for her efforts. And then Mya, who was poised to nab another perfect 30 came out and did the unthinkable: she earned a 9 from Carrie Ann who remarked she just wasn’t too crazy about the routine. Still she walked away with a 29.

In the end, it was Mya atop the leaderboard, with Joanna in second, Kelly in third and Donny in 4th. Tomorrow night, one couple will be sent packing, setting the stage for the finals next week. Who will that be?

I can tell you it SHOULD be Donny, but it will probably be Kelly as tonight, more than ever, the fan clubs of the world will determine who stays and who goes and Donny’s fan base is astronomical. So the finals will more than likely feature Mya, Joanna and if viewer voting stays the course, Donny. Sorry, but he doesn’t stand a chance next to the ladies when it comes time for the presentation of the trophy.

Of course, anything can happen.

Stay tuned.

P.S. Another great reason for tuning in Tuesday is to catch the Bee Gees — Robin and Barry Gibb —- who are slated to perform!