South Dakota rep. says ISIS sent us Obama, 7-Eleven managers

South Dakota state Rep. Betty Olson (R) writes a newspaper column for the Rapid City Journal, where she touches on a variety of subjects, ranging from the weather, local events, and in her latest column, ISIS.

The column, which was published last month after American journalist Steven Sotloff was beheaded, and she starts off with some truly mundane items.

“The weather has really cooled off,” Olson wrote. “It was 34 degrees here Friday morning and we heard from some of our neighbors that it was cold enough to leave frost on their windshields and nip the tomatoes.”

She also let readers know she helped decorate a parade float and commented on the Harding County football team.

“I think the score was Harding County 36 to 18 over Hill City,” Olson says of a fact that wouldn’t be difficult to verify.

The column then ended on what Olson called “a lighter note.”

“This morning ISIS and the Muslim Brotherhood warned the United States that if the United States continued meddling in Iraq, Libya, and other potential hot spots in the Middle East, they intend to cut off America’s supply of 7-11 and Motel 6 managers,” Olson wrote.

“If this action does not yield sufficient results, cab drivers will be next, followed by Dell, AT&T and AOL customer service reps.

“Finally, if all else fails, they have threatened not to send us any more presidents either.

“It’s gonna get ugly, people.”

h/t: Talking Points Memo