Dear Abby: Timeless poems offer humor, guidance

DEAR ABBY: I recently lost my address book in which I kept a copy of your “Keepers” booklet that I had sent away for a few years ago. I love the memorable poems and essays in it.I’d like to replace the booklet if it is available. I read through it so many times and now feel lost without it. I have read your advice for many years. Any help or information would be greatly appreciated. — PENNY IN EUREKA, MO.DEAR PENNY: I’m glad you enjoyed my “Keepers” booklet, and yes, it is available. It is light reading and contains poems and essays collected by my mother that have appeared in this column. So many readers requested reprints on humorous and inspirational items that hold special meaning for them that Mom decided to compile them into a booklet. To order a replacement for yours, send your name and mailing address, plus check or money order for $7 (U.S. funds), to: Dear Abby Keepers Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447. Shipping and handling are included in the price. Allow me to share one of the gems that always makes me smile:A MOTHER-IN-LAW’S PRAYER“O, Lord, help me to be glad when my son (or daughter) picks a mate. If he brings home a girl with two heads, let me love both of them equally. And when my son says, ‘Mom, I want to get married,’ forbid that I should blurt out, ‘How far along is she?’"And please, Lord, help me to get through the wedding preparations without a squabble with the ‘other side.’ And drive from my mind the belief that had my child waited awhile, he or she could have done better."Dear Lord, remind me daily that when I become a grandmother, my children don’t want advice on how to raise their children any more than I did when I was raising mine."If you will help me to do these things, perhaps my children will find me a joy to be around, and maybe I won’t have to write a ‘Dear Abby’ letter complaining about my children neglecting me. Amen.”DEAR ABBY: I’d like to know why they still call ex-presidents “president”? For example, President Clinton or President Bush. They clearly are not president any longer.— JUST WONDERING IN EUGENE, ORE.DEAR JUST WONDERING: True. However, this is a courtesy, a gesture of respect extended to individuals for their public service. Included in this category are retired former presidents, senators, governors, mayors and high-ranking military officers.Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.