DEAR ABBY: I’m in my early 30s. I live and work in a beach town and visit the ocean often on my time off. I have a large tattoo on my side, and while it’s tasteful and well done, it depicts nudity (an angel). It’s always covered by a shirt and never exposed at work.
While I know we’re living in a progressive era of expression, including body art, I wonder if it’s appropriate to go shirtless and display edgier graphic images like mine. Or could it be considered offensive to some folks who are not as open-minded?
I see plenty of other people display all kinds of ink at the beach, even with kids around. I have only had positive feedback about mine. The beachgoers I’ve met seem to be open-minded. To cover up or let it show — what are your thoughts? — TATTED IN FLORIDA
DEAR TATTED: If you want to get a tan, then go for it, but use sunscreen. However, not all beachgoers will be thrilled seeing a large naked angel getting roasted on the sand, so if you receive stares or critical comments, you may be more comfortable covering up.
DEAR ABBY: I am married to the kindest and most wonderful man in the world. We are happy and enjoy each other’s company.
He is impotent and was taking medication to correct it while we were dating and at the beginning of our marriage. The medication gave him terrible headaches, so we agreed to just let the sexual aspect of our marriage go by the wayside. That was 10 years ago. I was OK with it until I started dreaming about having sex with random men. Yikes!
I love my husband and would never cheat on him. I’m at a loss. Please help. — JUST A DREAM
DEAR JUST A DREAM: Being able to talk about these dreams may help them be less troubling and probably less frequent. If discussing them with your husband might upset or threaten him — you know him better than I do — then talk with a trusted friend or relative or a licensed mental health professional so you can vent. Of one thing I am sure: The harder one tries to suppress dreams, the more often they occur.
DEAR ABBY: I have very loud joints. When I stretch out my neck, back, fingers, etc., my joints pop, click, crack, whatever you call it. They’ve always done this, and it isn’t painful. The noise just happens when I stretch my body.
Some of my family and friends tell me they find it gross and don’t want to hear it. I want to be considerate, but sometimes I pop my joints automatically without thinking or because I really need to stretch. Is making this sound rude? I don’t try to make a lot of noise, but I can’t help it. — NOISY LADY IN MICHIGAN
DEAR NOISY LADY: According to the Cleveland Clinic, the older a person gets, the more noise one’s joints can make. This is normal. However, if there is pain along with it, it may be time to consult a doctor.
Because the noise is disconcerting to those around you, try to be mindful and refrain from doing it in their presence, or gently stretch the muscles around those joints, which may eliminate your need to “pop off” entirely.
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
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