If to Eyre is human, Lou Piniella is divine. The Cubs manager is determined to get his left-handed relievers name right one of these days especially after an exchange with beat reporters that went like this Wednesday:
PINIELLA (talking about his bullpen): Ive got [Carlos] Marmol and Kerry [Wood] and maybe Stevie Eyre to get us to [Bob] Howry. And Howry getting us to [Ryan] Dempster.
REPORTER: Did you do that on purpose?
PINIELLA: Whats that?
REPORTER: “Stevie Eyre.
PINIELLA: Is it Eyre? What is it?
REPORTERS (together): Its Scott.
PINIELLA: Well, God, I say the same thing all the time. I had a Stevie Eyre in Cincinnati. How about that?
REPORTER: Really? You said once that wasnt true.
PINIELLA: Maybe I didnt. I dont know, what the hell. Why do I say `Steve all the time? [Looking at media relations man Peter Chase] Remind me of that.
CHASE: I do.
REPORTER: Just think `Great Scott.
PINIELLA: Great Scott. I wont forget anymore. What the hells wrong with me? Scotty. Scotty. Scotty. You know what, when I mention his name, is it `Air or `Ire?
REPORTERS AND CHASE: “Air.
PINIELLA: So I said the `Eyre right. Scott Eyre. I love it. There wont be any more problems.