Final "Big Six" Lollapalooza headliners: Tool and the Killers

The Grammys have their “Big Four” categories each year; Lollapalooza has its “Big Six” headliners, two per night on the opposite ends of Grant Park.

The Chicago Tribune is reporting that Las Vegas glam-popsters the Killers and progressive-metal giants Tool have joined the Kings of Leon, the Beastie Boys, Jane’s Addiction and Depeche Mode as the year’s top acts on Aug. 7 to 9.

This columnist noted a few days ago that Lou Reed, Neko Case and Andrew Bird also are on the bill. The Tribune adds the Decemberists as a likely booking as well. Meanwhile, the Chicago Reader is playing an educated guessing game dropping names such as Girl Talk and Animal Collective, the Consequence of Sound blog adds Atmosphere, Delta Spirit, Friendly Fires, Kaiser Chiefs, the Ravonettes, Paul Green’s School of Rock All-Stars and theNewNo2 to the list, and Chicagoist really got the whole ball rolling with this post last month.

As usual, festival organizers are griping about not being able to control the news and all of these annoying Chicago reporters, you know, reporting.

“It’s pesky. But you gotta look at it like this: It’s kind of exciting these guys care enough to try to dig up what we’re doing every year,” Lollapalooza corporate figurehead Perry Farrell told MTV News. He then proceeded to do some leaking himself, promising more electronic artists on the roster.

An easy solution for Austin, TX-based promoters C3 Presents: Release the lineup already! (Twice in the past, the full list of acts was released on the first day of the South by Southwest Music & Media Conference.) Keeping it bottled up is just daring Chicago journalists to keep digging… though of course, that means even more stories and free publicity, so maybe that’s all part of the master plan. So let me do my part by adding another bombshell…

THE BEATLES WILL BE PLAYING LOLLAPALOOZA! Of course, it will be without John Lennon and George Harrison. Sources say Paul McCartney and Ringo Starr also will be sitting this one out, and the band that takes the stage will not actually be playing any older Fab Four tunes. Also, the group will be masquerading under a name other than the Beatles. Stay tuned for further developments!