The Bears still haven’t cleared tight end Zach Miller to run.
Last week, far away from Halas Hall, Miller did it anyway.
He ran in 50-yard increments, not close to a sprint but more intense than the jogging he’d tried when he was too curious about his left knee to stand still.
“It felt good to be up on my feet,” he said Monday, “doing something that there was a possibility I couldn’t ever do it.”
A year ago Monday, Miller dislocated his left knee catching a pass in the end zone — which was later ruled incomplete — at the Mercedes-Benz Superdome. The dislocation sliced the artery that delivered blood to Miller’s lower leg. Team doctors rushed him to University Medical Center in New Orleans, where staffers saved his leg from amputation.
Miller underwent nine surgeries, the most recent in January, to try to return to a normal life. The Bears re-signed him in June to rehab the injury. He has been on the physically unable-to-perform list since.
“I can’t decide if it’s been slow or fast,” Miller said. “When I was in it, I felt like the days were 48 hours long. It was slow. And I look at where I’m at now, and it’s almost like it went by in the blink of an eye.”
Trauma anniversaries are tricky. Some feel the date approaching in their bones like an echo. The gregarious Miller is too focused on what’s ahead of him to be maudlin. For now, that’s running again. He hasn’t ruled out playing again but seems at peace that it might never happen.
“I think the competitor in me drives me,” he said. “You do anything you can to accept the challenge. And conquer the challenge.”
Accomplishing goals marks a return to normalcy, like playing with his three children or driving his truck to work. He spent 10 minutes doing foot exercises Monday. For the first six months, he had trouble even moving his foot.
“You’re supposed to be this big, strong football player, and then you get all that taken away,” he said. “I needed help to shower, to go to the bathroom, brush my teeth. Those are humbling experiences, when your everyday life gets turned upside down.”
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Goals are a way to cope. Miller taught himself to play the piano that stood in his rented house. He has learned songs by Sam Hunt and from “A Star Is Born.”
He’s still a voice in the tight-ends room, traveling with the team, cutting up film and dispensing advice.
“He loves people, and he’s a great teammate,” coach Matt Nagy said. “Our guys feed off him. I feed off him.”
Even now. Especially now.
Miller could have let his life turn dark. He fought against it, remembering what his dad told him as a boy: “We’re only here for fun.”
“I’ve carried that with me for a long time,” he said. “And then it’s just a conscious effort of choosing to be that way. You could go the opposite way. What good does that do?”
