White Sox’ bad idea of a uniform from 1976 is still a bad idea

I had done my best to forget those hideous White Sox uniforms from 1976-81. I could go years without thinking about those ill-fitting, wide-lapelled nightmares, more costume than athletic wear.

But then the Sox put them on their players Thursday night, and now I can’t stop thinking about leisure suits, Arnold Horshack from “Welcome Back, Kotter,’’ zits, female rejection, Paul McCartney and Wings, and “Love Story.’’ Thanks a lot.

Why were we condemned to watching history repeat? Because it was Throwback Thursday at The Cell.

Throwback Thursday? Yes, please do.

The uniforms were a terrible idea in 1976, when owner Bill Veeck came up with the stunt to put more butts in seats. He also introduced shorts, which the White Sox wore three times. If there is one silver lining to this story, it’s that the Sox wore pants Thursday and we were not exposed to Chris Sale’s legs.

I don’t agree with the people who say the entire 1970s were a bad idea and need to be forgotten. But if those same people were to hold up those smocks as Exhibit A, I’d have a hard time disagreeing.

Sometimes hefty people wear baggy clothing in an attempt to hide their heftiness and end up looking like people wearing Hefty bags. That’s what those uniforms were. On Thursday, every Sox player immediately gained 20 pounds upon donning those jerseys.

We need the uniform equivalent of Disco Demolition though without the disorderly conduct. Once and for all, let’s rid the earth of this crime against baseball and fashion. A bonfire at second base. What do you say, Sox?


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