Dear Abby: When guests leave, items are missing

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DEAR ABBY: I can’t talk to anyone about this (including my husband) because they’ll think something’s wrong with me or I am making it up.

When my son and his wife come to visit or we visit them, there’s always something missing from my house or from my suitcase (when we visit them).

When they visit, it’s always small items like a china teacup, a nut bowl or a figurine. After we return from a visit, there’s always a piece of costume jewelry or an item of clothing missing from my suitcase.

The items are always inexpensive. I never see these in their house, so I suspect she just takes them and throws them out.

I don’t know what to do aside from confronting her, which will probably cause a rift with my son. I’ve mentioned it to my husband and he refuses to believe me! Is there something wrong with her? Please help. I don’t know how to handle this. — GOING NUTS IN SOUTH CAROLINA

DEAR GOING NUTS: Seeing is believing. Before your son and daughter-in-law’s next visit, consider setting up one or more security cameras around your home.

If what you suspect proves to be true, your daughter-in-law may suffer from emotional problems that need to be addressed.

And when you visit them, make sure to lock your belongings in your suitcase. If nothing else, that may give you peace of mind.

DEAR ABBY: I am recently separated. I just started seeing a guy who was also recently separated and who will soon be divorced.

The problem is, he is my friend “Melissa’s” soon-to-be ex. They are breaking up because she cheated on him and left him for the other person. He’s a great guy, and it’s too soon to tell if this could turn into an actual relationship.

Melissa isn’t a best friend of mine, but she’s more than just an acquaintance. Should I pursue this or stop now? — CONFUSED IN BROOKLYN

DEAR CONFUSED: When it comes to rebound romances, I advise to proceed with caution, so you don’t get hurt.

If you like this man, be a supportive friend to him for now. If the relationship develops into something more serious from there, so be it. You didn’t cause the divorce, Melissa did, and you shouldn’t be blamed.

DEAR ABBY: When restaurant hosts/hostesses decide where to seat patrons, I wish they would consider their mobility. Many times I have accompanied mobility-impaired family members and friends, and the host didn’t consider the distance to the table.

I understand that restaurant hosts try to balance the number of tables for the wait staff, but surely they can also consider the occasional patron who would greatly appreciate a shorter walk to their table. — MOBILITY-IMPAIRED PATRON

DEAR PATRON: Restaurant hosts are not dictators, nor are they mind readers. If you or someone you are with has a disability that must be accommodated, inform the host and request a table that suits your needs. If the establishment values your patronage, the employees will be happy to comply.

Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.

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