Middle school students’ advice for other kids: ‘Don’t put too much pressure on yourself’

Five eighth graders from Evanston offer their experience and wisdom about navigating middle school.

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(From left) Arad Takloo-Bighash, Janelle Leigh, and Jack Beauchamp, all eighth-grade students at Nichols Middle School in Evanston, stand outside the school, Monday, July 10, 2023.

Ashlee Rezin/Sun-Times

Advice, resources, and reflections on back-to-school season for Chicago's students, families, and educators.

In this piece, five incoming eighth graders from Evanston weigh in on the redemptive power of summer and the good, bad, and ugly of transitioning back to school each fall. They’ve also included tailored advice for incoming middle school students.

Janelle Leigh

I’m Janelle, and I have an older sister in high school and a dog named Thunder. My biggest interest is sports. I play soccer and basketball and enjoy playing other sports at school or with my family. I also enjoy playing puzzle games that challenge me.”

Janelle Leigh’s advice: Be open to advice from others, and don’t let worry stop you from trying.

Janelle Leigh’s advice: Be open to advice from others, and don’t let worry stop you from trying.

On why summer is important to her, Janelle said, “It’s about quality time with my family, especially my sister. Next year, my sister is going to be a senior in high school; it’s one of the last times I get to spend with her before she goes to college.

“Summer is when we bond the most. We can go get ice cream together, walk our dog on the bike trail on the beach, and stay up late laughing.”

Janelle also said she loves that summer is a time to “get deep into your hobbies and interests that you normally wouldn’t have time for.”

Looking back on her transition into middle school, Janelle said: “When starting sixth grade, I had no idea what to expect and would have loved getting advice.”

Her suggestion for incoming middle schoolers?

“Sometimes we worry so much about how bad an assignment will go that we don’t even try. This could translate to lots of missing work that keeps getting later each day, and in life, this might translate to you missing opportunities that might never come back, like this Sun-Times project! If I had gotten too nervous even to try it, I would have never learned how fun it actually was to be a part of this.”

Generally, Janelle looks forward to the start of a new school year. She is an avid and naturally curious learner: “In seventh grade, I didn’t realize how much I was learning until I started referencing school all the time. My mom and I would be walking the dog together, and then I would just start to talk about something I learned, or just randomly, I would connect things from school with real life.”

Arad Takloo-Bighash

My name is Arad. I live in Evanston, Illinois, with my sister, parents and two ferrets. I love playing volleyball and doing math. When I grow up, I would like to be a mathematician.

For incoming middle schoolers, Arad Takloo-Bighash suggested adding extracurriculars one at a time and trying not to overcommit.

For incoming middle schoolers, Arad Takloo-Bighash suggested adding extracurriculars one at a time and trying not to overcommit.

For Arad, the transition back to school often feels jarringly abrupt and jam-packed. “Just take an average day,” he said. “When I get to school, I have French, then drama, then English. By this time, it’s only about 11. Then I eat lunch, go to gym class and head to history, where I learn about a war fought between old white men who couldn’t have cared less about me. And then I go to math. I make some small talk with my friends and walk home. It’s now 3.”

According to Arad, no matter how hard teachers might try to make their lessons engaging and fun, there is a certain monotony to daily life at school that eventually feels like a grind that contrasts strongly with the relaxation felt over summer break.

That monotony and the constant threat of school shootings make Arad especially anxious to start the new school year. “In this country, we’re under constant threat. Sometimes in class, I find my eyes darting around the classroom. I’m calculating a plan just in case we encounter an active shooter. Where will I hide? Will we run?”/he says this in his ital intro/am

For incoming middle schoolers, Arad suggested adding extracurriculars one at a time and trying not to overcommit.

“The second half of my seventh-grade year was pretty messy for me,” he said, “I made too many commitments at once, so I wasn’t able to thrive in any of them. My grades suffered, as well as my performance in all aspects of my life. I have since learned that this isn’t really sustainable.”

Extracurriculars are really important, he said, because those are the things we really like and look forward to. “But find a good balance,” he suggests.

Drea Gaul

My name is Drea, and I like hanging out with my dog, friend, and family. I love watching baseball, and my favorite team is the White Sox. I love spending time outside in the summer.

Drea Gaul said: “I’m really looking forward to being a positive role model and setting a great example for the younger grades!”

Drea Gaul advised students to enjoy the first week of school, when “we’re all getting to know each other, so there isn’t so much pressure.”

“If I could go back in time and talk to my sixth-grade self for a day,” Drea said, “I would say: Don’t put so much pressure on yourself! As an incoming sixth grader, I was a BIG perfectionist. Because of that, I was really hard on myself when it came to grades. Honestly, it can become an obsessive habit.”

On going back to school, Drea said there are pros and cons, but she’s really looking forward to eighth grade. “Because of COVID, our class basically missed fifth grade, and so we missed the opportunity to be the leaders in our school. Zoom school just isn’t the same!” With all that power comes responsibility, and Drea said: “I’m really looking forward to being a positive role model and setting a great example for the younger grades!”

“The worst part of going back to school, for me, is the sudden change of time and the extreme amount of energy we have to expend, which can be fun and exciting but also tiring,” Drea said.

She recommended easing into the school schedule by setting an alarm and gradually waking up a little earlier each day leading up to the start of school.

Also, she told kids to enjoy the first week: “A lot of times there isn’t as much homework, and teachers are just preparing kids for the school year, and we’re all getting to know each other, so there isn’t as much pressure.”

Jack Beauchamp

Hey, I’m Jack. I like to listen to music and make videos with my friends. My advice for going back to school is not to stress it too much. It’s not as difficult as people say.

Jack Beauchamp said: “I look forward to seeing more people, considering I don’t see everyone I know from school over the summer.”

Jack Beauchamp advised embracing the new routines of a new school year, although they can be a little disorienting.

For Jack, the most difficult part of returning to school is all the unknowns that each new year brings. “I’m so used to the previous year’s routine,” he said, “that when I’m faced with brand new classes, teachers and peers, it disorients me a little.”

While adjusting can take a bit, Jack said that this newness isn’t all bad. “The flip side is that we get entirely new classes, which means we get all new people to work with and the opportunity to make new friends.”

With this fresh start comes a brand new social scene.

“I look forward to seeing more people, considering I don’t see everyone I know from school over the summer. Also, hearing the good summer stories everyone tells is a highlight of a new school year.”

What should kids focus on at the start of the year? Jack said, “Maybe mental health? But honestly, I’m not even sure what that means.”

Elea Thompson

My name is Elea. I like being with my friends and riding my bike around my hometown.

Elea has some words of wisdom for those just starting middle school: “As an eighth-grade girl, I know that being popular sounds great. For example, it sounds cool to say you have a ton of friends. But in reality, life is better when you have a few close friends that you know you can depend on. Sometimes we conflate having good friends and being well-known.”

Elea said as long as you have at least one good friend, middle school is much easier. She wants her fellow middle schoolers to know that because you have a natural ability in a subject doesn’t mean the class will be easy. You must get to know and understand a teacher’s style, which can also affect your performance.

Elea advised observing during the first week in order to figure out “which teachers you can joke with and which ones to be more reserved and quiet with. This will help with a smooth transition back.”

Simone Larson is a mother, writer and middle school teacher in Evanston.

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