DEAR ABBY: My brother-in-law found out I smoke marijuana. I have a medical card and some mental disabilities. Marijuana helps with my anxiety.
Although we live near each other, my in-laws now say they don’t want me in their homes. The stress this has put on my husband is unfair. His brother obviously has a problem with me.
I never discuss marijuana with anyone and don’t carry it around with me. I use it only in the privacy of my home. How should I expect my husband to handle holidays or even regular get-togethers? I really need help. — UNFAIR IN NEVADA
DEAR UNFAIR: Medical and recreational marijuana are legal for adults in the state of Nevada. I wish you had mentioned how your brother-in-law learned you are using it.
That it is being used as an excuse to isolate you is cruel. How your husband chooses to handle further contact — or lack of it — with his relatives will be his personal decision.
Not knowing how close they have been, I can’t guess what his next step should be — except to point out that his first loyalty should be to you.
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DEAR ABBY: I’m a sophomore in high school, and I need some boy help
I go to a small school, where there are only 60 sophomores, and we’re all pretty close. There’s this one guy that I kind of like, but I don’t know how to strike up a conversation with him. I know I could ask him for rides to places, since he can drive and I can’t yet.
My problem is I have no classes with him this year, so I can’t do any of the “can you help me with homework” or “did you understand this concept” flirting. He invites me to his parties, but he does that with almost everyone.
I know this is a bit of a random jumble of a letter, but I’m hoping for advice on how to start a conversation, especially because we share no classes. — SMALL SCHOOL PROBLEM
DEAR SMALL SCHOOL PROBLEM: Discuss current events, pop culture or school activities. Tell him about things you like.
Because many high school-age boys are interested in sports, find out which ones he’s interested in and ask questions about those. Unless he’s sports-averse, I can almost guarantee it’ll generate conversation.
DEAR ABBY: Today I received the best news ever. My son and his wife are expecting their first child. I am beyond happy for them.
I was so excited, I couldn’t wait to tell my husband. His reaction? “Don’t tell me ‘Cathy’ is pregnant! I hope your son will be able to support it!”
“IT” is my future first grandchild — and my husband’s first (step-)grandchild. My son and his wife do very well financially. He has a great job and is up for a promotion.
I always feel like no matter what I say, my husband always has to put a negative spin on it. Or am I overreacting? — HAPPY GRANDMA-TO-BE
DEAR HAPPY: Your husband either has a questionable sense of humor or enjoys putting people down. Surely you knew this before you married him, so rather than dwell on it, choose not to let him rain on your parade.
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at http://www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
Good advice for everyone — teens to seniors — is in “The Anger in All of Us and How to Deal With It.” To order, send your name and mailing address, plus check or money order for $7 (U.S. funds), to: Dear Abby, Anger Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447. (Shipping and handling are included in the price.)
