‘Very Cavallari’ season ends on happy note as Kristin opens Chicago store, Justin pops question

The stakes couldn’t be higher on the the Season 3 finale of “Very Cavallari,” as Kirstin and Jay—

Ah, who are we kidding? I can’t keep up the charade for one more word. The stakes are medium at best. Actually, the stakes are pretty low, given the main storyline is about the opening of the second Uncommon James store featuring apparel and jewelry and soy candles and stuff. The first store was in Nashville; this one is the West Loop.

“If Chicago can do well, then the sky’s the limit,” says Kristin.

Before the Chicago trip, we drop in on K-Cav and her husband, former Bears quarterback Jay Cutler (always and forever identified as “JAY, KRISTIN’S HUSBAND” in the show’s graphics), in the kitchen of their Nashville home, as Jay announces breaking news:

“I’m going to have another latte!”

Kristin: “I could have like 10 coffees a day.”

Jay: “Let’s do it and see what happens.”

Jay is wearing the most luxurious hoodie you’ve ever seen. I’m thinking there’s at least a 30% chance it’s actual bear pelt. You could put this thing in front of a fireplace in a Montana ski lodge and people would roll around on it.

Later in the program, Kristin and Jay discuss the possibility of Jay becoming a football broadcast analyst. (This would make Jay the latest in a long line of jocks who were surly and dismissive of the media when they were playing but turn into sunny, bubbly TV personalities after they’ve retired).

“I actually think that would be good for us,” says Kristin. “I think it’s important to have something to live for, a reason to get dressed in the morning.”

Dang Jay, K-Cav is telling you to get a life!

Before the official opening of the Chicago store (which actually took place last October), there’s a friends and family event, with Jay’s former Bears teammates Zach Miller and Kyle Long in attendance. They gather around the display for Jay’s contribution to the Uncommon James line: a gunmetal bracelet that comes with a working bottle opener that also serves to screw the bracelet on and off. (Only 68 smackers!)

We know the opener works because it’s used to uncap a bottle of Dos Equis. The label on the bottle of Dos Equis is blurred, as apparently Dos Equis and “Very Cavallari” didn’t reach a product placement agreement — but it’s definitely a bottle of Dos Equis, and I just gave Dos Equis one-two-three-four-five mentions in one paragraph for no fee!

Here’s a shocker for you. There’s a huge line outside the store on opening day, as fans started lining up at 1 a.m.

TO. BUY. STUFF.

Just goes to show you, if you work hard enough and assemble the right team and oh yeah it helps if you’re a famous reality TV star and your show serves as a weekly commercial, you can succeed!

The Season 3 finale also has a subplot about K-Cav’s friends Justin and Scoot, who have endured some rocky times but are now thriving as a couple, to the point where Justin is ready to propose to Scoot at their home in Nashville.

E!

Kristin and Jay, as well as Justin’s sister and Scoot’s brother, watch from on a monitor in the garage as Justin works up the nerve for this very special, intimate moment — which is also being captured by the camera and boom mic operators who are also in the living room.

The cynic in me can’t help but roll his eyes at this staged scenario. The seasoned critic in me knows they even might have had to reshoot certain moments if there was a hiccup with the lighting or sound.

And yet. Even though I don’t know anything about Scoot and Justin beyond the superficial, made-for-reality-TV glimpses into their lives, even though I realize everything from the piano-driven soundtrack music to the cutaway shots of friends and family tearing up (even Jay seems touched) is all part of a manipulative, well-edited package …

It got to me. Good for Justin and Scoot. It wasn’t so long ago that a reality show featuring two men in love and possibly getting married — with a former NFL quarterback among the group cheering them on, no less — would have been met with outrage and protests. It’s pretty great to see Season 3 ending on such a lovely and romantic note.